Why is it that God sometimes chooses to say ‘no’ to our heartfelt prayers, prayed with the best motives we can muster? I’m sure, like me, you have sometimes found yourself in the position of realising that God chose another route rather than the one you were helpfully suggesting to Him? Earlier this year when I was expecting Esther’s birth any day, I asked God to allow her to be born. I was tired, aching and felt emotionally prepared for her arrival. But God chose to delay her coming. At the time I felt peeved. With my ‘rear view mirror’, I can now see part of the reason.

At the beginning of January a good friend called me with a spiritual issue she wanted some advice on, connected with curses. I confess that I was at a loss. I knew very little about what she needed. I rang another friend, who is involved in Christian publishing, to ask if he knew of any resources on the subject. Within the week, he had brought round a weighty tome which contained comprehensively useful material. I began to dip into the book, reading it ‘for my friend.’

However, it soon become clear that God wanted me to read the book FOR MYSELF. God then contrived for me to contract ‘Flu. Confined to my bed for three days and feeling rough for another few, I read the book from cover to cover. Pretty much every time Jon came to check on me, I was in tears. “Are you ok Ems?” he would ask, worriedly. “Yup” I would reply, “Its just God stuff. I’m fine.” In those special few days, God and I did some serious spiritual spring- cleaning of my emotional cupboards. I knew Esther would not be born until the process was finished, which in all took three weeks.

I had thought I was ready to have my baby girl, but God knew better. He knew I had to deal with some major roadblocks in my life that were ungodly – mindsets that had taken hold and become so second nature, that they were ‘first nature’. I needed to speak out what I had believed about myself, repent and seek God for healing and restoration.

Isn’t it a mercy that God doesn’t always answer our prayers the way we would like? Can you imagine what a continual disaster area our lives would be if God did everything we requested like some nervous spotty teenage waiter? Our God would become our servant instead of our Master, working for us rather than the other way round. Sometimes He says no because what we have asked for is wrong for us, or for those around us. We may never know the reason, but I suspect that I will spend a great deal of eternity thanking my Father that on occasion He chose NOT to answer me with a ‘yes’, planning my life for my good and His glory instead.